I’m a perfectionist and it’s ruining my work life balance! What do I do?

You’re not alone. Perfectionism can be helpful at times; it also makes it hard to put yourself first if everything has to be completed perfectly all the time.

Perfectionism often leads individuals to overcommit, fearing that declining opportunities may reflect inadequacy. However, consistently saying “yes” can result in burnout and decreased performance. Setting boundaries and occasionally declining offers is actually a form of self-care. By prioritizing actions that align with your goals and your well-being, you can maintain high standards without compromising your health.

Additionally, perfectionists often struggle with differentiating between taking a necessary breather and avoiding a task because they fear it can’t be done perfectly in the allotted time. While shutting down is not a solution, and will likely exacerbate the issue, giving yourself time to relax is vital for productivity and mental health. Remember, self-compassion is key; treat yourself with kindness during these moments so that your rest is effective and doesn’t lead to burnout.

Incorporating these strategies into your routine can help manage perfectionist tendencies, leading to a healthier and more balanced approach to personal and professional challenges. Here are some other practical tips:

• Be Okay with Saying No: Avoid overextending yourself by blocking off time in your schedule, including time for friends/family and to rest. Set clear priorities, and use a simple, firm response like, “I can’t make that work with my current commitments.” If you find pushback difficult to handle, remember that “No” is a complete sentence.
• Set Realistic Goals: Break down larger tasks into manageable steps and set achievable standards to reduce overwhelm and maintain motivation. Focus on your progress, allowing yourself to celebrate small victories along the way. Keeping realistic expectations also allows for flexibility and self-compassion when things don’t go as planned.
• Overcome Your Fear of Failure: If a fear of failure is the issue, gradual exposure can be beneficial. Intentionally engage in tasks where perfection is NOT the goal to desensitize yourself to the anxiety associated with making mistakes. This practice helps build resilience by embracing imperfections as opportunities for growth.
• Limit Social Comparisons: Reduce exposure to social media or environments that trigger comparisons. Focus on your unique journey and accomplishments. Either set time limits on your social media platforms, which can be done manually or with tools on your phone or computer, or go on a hiatus from them altogether.
• Schedule Regular Breaks: Incorporate short, intentional breaks during tasks to recharge and prevent burnout. This helps maintain productivity and mental clarity. Deep breathing, mindfulness, or simply stepping away from work briefly can renew your focus and give you energy.
• Seek Support When Needed: Don’t hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or professionals for guidance and encouragement in managing perfectionist tendencies. You are not alone, and there is help. If you are truly struggling and don’t know where to turn, reach out to the NAMI Helpline.